Doing a DPhil can be hard work – but juggling it with having a baby or raising a family is impossible, right? We spoke to two recent graduates who have done just that and found that the flexibility of doing a DPhil while having a child definitely has its positives.
What is your experience of studying for a DPhil while raising a family?
Both: Being a DPhil student means that life can be flexible – as long as you are progressing and you’re doing the work you agreed with your supervisors, your working hours can be arranged to suit you and your family. This can make the school pick-ups and school holidays manageable and, in many ways, it can be more flexible than a regular 9-5 job or clinical shift work.
KT: It’s not always easy though. My main hurdle was the lack of sleep and emotional upheaval that goes with wanting to spend time with your little one, versus wanting to dedicate yourself to your DPhil project. Returning from maternity leave was difficult as I wanted to be on top of everything in the same way I was before I had a baby and my thoughts would always drift back to my son.
HG: One of the biggest challenges for me was my year of fieldwork, which involved uprooting my family to Asia for a year. My partner was very supportive and took on all the childcare, but even then, it was emotionally difficult trying to juggle data collection with feeling responsible for having made my family move on my behalf. More generally, because I was passionate about my DPhil topic, I found it hard to switch off, especially in the final year when I was doing data analysis and writing up. This meant when I was home with the children I’d feel very distracted – it’s hard to get that balance right sometimes.
How did having a child influence your decision to do a DPhil, or vice versa?
KT: I had already started my DPhil when my partner and I decided to start our family. I was at a place in my life (and age) where it seems right to have a child, some may say despite doing a DPhil. I do not think postdoc life is less demanding and more flexible than DPhil. However, I think the experience is likely to depend on how supportive your supervisors are and what the general attitude to work/life balance is in your group.
HG: My decisions to have children and pursue a DPhil were quite independent of each other – I wouldn’t say one influenced the other. I felt that it was possible to do both. The only impact was that it made me have to think more carefully about fieldwork abroad, as there were implications on our children and their schooling etc., but in the end, we decided to go ahead with the year abroad and it worked out well.
How does NDPH and/or the University support you? Have you faced any challenges?
HG: My supervisors were incredibly supportive. More widely NDPH has been supportive though I think that initially there were some doubts whether I would manage.
KT: I found it hard to track down the Department’s parental leave policy at the time, but now it is much clearer. DPhil students receive 6 months full maternity leave at the same rate of their stipend, which was a huge help and very much appreciated and now you can do a DPhil part-time. The waiting lists for childcare in Oxford are very long, and university childcare places are in high demand. As a student you are slightly bumped up the waiting list but I was lucky to get one of the departmental sponsored nursery places. My little one was able to start when I went back to my studies.
What would your advice be to anyone with a family who is thinking about doing a DPhil?
- There is never really a “perfect” time to have a child or do start a DPhil – sometimes you have to go for it with the faith that everything will slot into place
- Find a supervisor who is understanding and supportive
- Consider applying to a family-friendly / graduate-only college as they can have a large group of student parents who are very supportive and run lots of family-oriented events
- Think about doing your DPhil part-time
Do your children understand that you’re at University? What do they think about you being a student?
HG: My older son (6 yrs) understands but to him it’s all he’s ever known so I don’t think he finds it unusual! Both our children were involved in college life and really enjoyed that part of me being a student.
KT: My son just knows that I go to work when he goes to nursery. However, he’s been to a few Departmental socials and likes coming to college – he also had fun parading around in my gown and mortarboard when I had my viva!
The Department’s parental leave policy can be found here and on Weblearn. HG and KT (not their real initials) asked to remain anonymous.
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